I hate to have a dig, really I do, but have to say certain offerings from L.N.C.C.* (click) often amuse. There's some rather good designer clobber for sale on their site one notes. Quite a bit of 'we're so cool we're not even bothering trying to be cool' posturing. Also cool. There's occasionally some smartingly-cool/quite preposterous fashion designs on there (that you should probably know about, yeah?). Very expensive and really quite directional stuff presented in double-earnest manner. Piece of the weekend for me, is the mohair shorts from Uru (click), £272. You must know Uru, no? *Late Night Chlamydia Clinic.

Uru 'brick' mohair shorts.

Uru seems like a marginally normal trendy-brand (click), except perhaps double-spenny for quite low-key looking bits on L.N.C.C., (click). Actually, maybe that's not their site. Anyway, when one is offered some stringy shorts in brick (shall we say brick?) mohair, for nearly 300 bar, one has to laugh into one's Nespresso. Tres-soz for being old fashioned but gotta raise an eyebrow at those, surely?

Take-up for the Highland-ceramic self-defence classes was initially slow.

Shorts over pants or leggings appear to be 'a thing'. Misappropriated from courier style, or that quite genuinely good look that urban five-aside footballers sometimes adopt when on way home on bus? Or is it just really daft-bollocks trendy stuff? You tell me. The Shortarialist himself said it was the most important new look he was seeing in menswear (click), it 'scares and inspires' him, and it made his pipe feel funny taking pictures of it, or similar. Key issue: on recent pant naming trends, is this style thus called 'Shoggings' or 'Sheggings?".

Damir Doma 'midnight fire-drill' shorts.

Meanwhile, the models all have parallel feet on L.N.C.C. Hate parallel feet. Can't explain now, but they're the opposite of being a live, poised human being. Parallel feet, Pah!... Don't you Damir Doma me either or I'll fucking freak (click)... Sorry, I appear to have had a couple too many Jaffa cakes.

Stubbs out.

Damir Doughnuts- 'Playing with proportion and posture'. (Thinks: Just another 14 months and am free. Damn The Croatian National Service Catering Corps.)

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