So been doing this watch style page for The Telegraph, haven't I. Did I ever put the previous one from March, up? Cant remember. This is it, but don't think can read the text the way have done it. The illustration of me is quite bad. Suit looks like got it out of a skip and vest doesn't match. Its in fact Thom Sweeney. Shoes look like Clarks Spatulas. The ones in the screen grab they took this off are by Louis Vuitton and are not spatulas. That said, I'd prefer a duff illo to a duff photo, but I wouldn't take style advice off a scribble-face spatulas-foot guy. Hope the Duchess of Dundee (The Editor) doesn't read this from China and punish me. Think she is in China, which may or may not be a result deadline wise. Wanna hear some interesting stuff about the Rolex Daytona AKA the Paul Newman watch?

You've gonna have to show some sort of enthusiasm about it as am recovering from a night at the Lyceum with sister while simultaneously on freaking deadline. We weren't performing you'll be glad to hear.

Scribble bonce out.