NAFTA'S WRONG CARPET

Morning Style Merchants. Have to very briefly mention The Bafta red carpet from Sunday, might come back to it, but it'll be older news than it even is now. Some men that looked okay are on GQ.Com (click) but they had to resort to putting some blokes that didnt even dress that well in too. More 'Reasonably/Acceptably Dressed' than 'Best Dressed'. I was shocked by the whole red carpet spectacle, not just the men. Hamish Bowles stood out by the way, not only for his lively, artfully executed take on evening wear, slipper print vs tartan pushing the envelope he was opening, but because he simply walked straight up the carpet and into the Opera House. That act alone marked him out as a dignfied chap. Bravo Bowlesy.

Hamish Bowles nicely up the red carpet.

Not gonna get sidetracked too badly, as believe it or not am on doppio deadline again, but something needs to be done about the wrong carpet scene. Here's the rough set up. Excuse my lingua on this, but is only way to get the truth across. Outside the barriers are hordes of baying (and they were baying and banging the barriers like savages at times) proles, who'd been there for however long to catch sight of people from films and aimlessly scream their names. Totes horrid scene. Then inside the barriers a steady lapping tide of appallingly dressed Bafta industry guests/corporate people drifted in, stopping continuously to take selfies or group shots of each other to the point of causing idiot bottle-necks of tawdry self-congratulatory photo-documentary. They were all at it. It was hideous to behold. Ghastly peope buoyed by their position on the nasty red nylon into blithely ignoring any protocol or elegance, taking pony snaps of each other to brandish and distribute later. God help us. Layers of wrongness the Baying Proles also filming the Red Carpet Plebs filming each other, with the alarmed/anxious actors (some style savvy/some not so) picking their way through this awful post-modern conceit nightmare scenario, trying to find the correct TV crew to talk to. Bafta seriously need to ban red carpet selfies. Am not messing. It reached naff epidemic and it was properly awful scene that ensued. Shame on you, you completely naff pillocks. To make matters far, far worse, the red carpet plebs were dressed so, so badly you wouldn't believe me. Makes me wonder if setting bar far too high in editorial, and perhaps should be saying, "do please try and wear actual black shoes with a dinner suit, fun waistcoats/matching pattern ties are awful and also its best to get a dry cleaner to actually turn your trousers up to the length that approximately sits on/near your nasty footwear". Heinous crimes against evening wear. It's the middle Middle Class that get it really wrong I reckon. Surely they should know better, maybe not? People below/foreigners seek help, the above middle-do in fact know better (in many cases), but the middle just glibly think they know and wing it. They don't. Some actors dressed well. Some did not. That is my review thus far.

Stubbs out.

PS. I really like this shot of Coogan and O'Leary just before they did interview. Tense but cool, no? O'Leary is in Gieves&Hawkes, innit?

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